"The 12 Pains of Christmas" by Bob Rivers

[Retail Fan+ (Justin Hill)]

This hilarious song names twelve things that can be quite stressful about the holidays:

The first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Is finding a Christmas tree


The second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree


The third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree


The fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Sending Christmas cards
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree


The fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Five months of bills
Sending Christmas cards
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree


The sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Facing my in-laws
Five months of bills
"I hate those Christmas cards!"
Hangovers
Rigging up these lights
And finding a Christmas tree


The seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
The Salvation Army
Facing my in-laws
Five months of bills
Sending Christmas cards
"Aw geez"
"I'm trying to rig up these lights!"
And finding a Christmas tree


The eighth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
"I want Transformers for Christmas"
"Charities, and what do you mean your in-laws?"
Five months of bills
"Ah, mailing out these cards!"
"Edith, get me a beer, huh!"
"What, we have no extension cord?!?"
And finding a Christmas tree


The ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Finding parking spaces
"Daddy, I want some candy!"
"Donations!"
Facing my in-laws
Five months of bills
"Writing up those Christmas cards"
Hangovers
"Now why the hell are they blinking?"
And finding a Christmas tree


The tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Batteries not included
No parking spaces
"Buy me something!"
"Get a job ya bum!"
Facing the in-laws
Five months of bills
"Yo ho, sending Christmas cards"
"Ah geez, look at this!"
"One light goes out, they all go out!"
And finding a Christmas tree


The eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Stale TV specials
Batteries not included
No parking spaces
"I gotta go to the bathroom"
Charities
"She's a witch, I hate her!"
Five months of bills
"Oh, I don't even know half these people!"
"Who's got the toilet paper?"
"Get a flashlight, I blew a fuse!"
And finding a Christmas tree


The twelfth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Singing Christmas Carols
Stale TV specials
Batteries not included
No parking
"Waaah!"
Charities
Gotta make 'em dinner
Five months of bills
"I'm not sending them, Mister, that's it!"
"Shut up, you!"
"Fine, you're so smart, you rig up the lights!"
And finding a Christmas tree

[EddieJ1984]

I know its after Christmas and all, but I agree this song is funny, love it.